Today marks the 2-year anniversary of when I met my husband. I clearly remember him walking through the restaurant door and I was eerily calm. I had decided months before that I was going to be living on my own, doing the single mom gig without a spouse and I was okay with that.
I so easily accepted the lies that laid deep within my soul.
As we sat there talking a battle ensued inside my head. This man was opening up to me yet I was convinced he would not last long. He knew I was a single mother with three children ages 6, 3, and 2. He heard me say I was in school and that my life was chaotic and overwhelming.
But he had no clue what it was like to live that truth every.single.day.
I still bore the emotional bruising from my divorce and convinced myself no one would want me, my children, our life. I listened to him talk and realized he was a wounded soul too. He had been hurt and carried the scars as proof.
We both needed grace and I was scared to death. My boundaries were set, the stakes were planted in the muddiness of my heart and there was no way I was letting this man anywhere near me.
I wrapped up the evening by telling him I needed to get diapers and head home expecting him to walk away and never look back. I laughed nervously when he asked to tag along.
He walked around that store with me, followed me down each aisle and has not left my side since.
"The intentional choice to share our pain requires us to forgive those who have hurt us; the doubts and insecurities a finery of hope." - Jo Ann Fore
These two years have taught me much about true forgiveness. For me it happens when I think of past hurts and decide my life now was worth that time spent in the dark. Forgiveness of others defines my mood, my outlook on the day and how I treat my family.
As I let go of the pain and allow God to refine me, that's when I grow and become His true creation. He brought me the love and acceptance of an amazing man and I am grateful everyday for the amazing restoration of our lives.
I love you B.
Linking up this week with Jo Ann Fore as we discuss forgiveness and how it can bring hope to our lives. Her book releases October 8th and I have had the distinct privilege of working side-by-side with her over the past month. Her story is real, heartfelt and breathtaking. Won't you join us on the journey?
Look for the book:
When a Woman Finds Her Voice
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